Argento’s Dracula 3-D is pretty miserable, and if the director intends to rise from the grave and return to relevance this is one motion picture that’s needs to be forgotten about as quickly as possible.

Gravity (2013) is as big a wow as anything I’m likely to see throughout the remainder of this year. It is doubtful, from a cinematic esthetic at any rate, that there will be anything else released in 2013 that I can even compare it to.

Runner Runner isn’t good, sitting down at the table to play any of the hands it ends up dealing a monumental waste of time.

Talbert’s film is boringly mundane at best, offensively distasteful at worst, everything moving along at such a turgidly sluggish pace I wondered if anyone involved honestly cared to put forth anything close to their best efforts during filming. Baggage Claim is pretty much a disaster, the only solace I can find is the comfort in knowing I’ll never have to think about it again after I finish writing this review.

Cloudy with a Chance for Meatballs 2 improves upon its predecessor in every conceivable way, and slap me in the face with a slice of a bologna but I’m actually kind of curious to see what adventures inventor Flint Lockwood, meteorologist Sam Sparks and the rest of their curious gaggle of stalwart friends might decide to cook up for themselves next.

While not the psychologically disturbing stunner it’s always on the verge of becoming, Dark Touch still has plenty on its mind that’s worthy of discussion, the inhumane horrors at its core so deeply personal and all-encompassing the supernatural aspects augmenting them aren’t even necessary.

Don Jon is still a fairly strong debut, showcasing directorial chops that could serve Gordon-Levitt well if he chooses to step behind the camera again. The film is a moderately challenging character study of a man battling demons he didn’t realize were tearing his life apart, and while the lessons he learns are hardly earthshattering that doesn’t make them any less potent or worthy of additional contemplation.

There’s a lot to like about +1, plenty of idiosyncratic, highly original moments worthy of singling out for praise…curious genre fans looking for something a little bit different owe it to themselves to give the film a chance.

I was smiling broadly as I exited the theater, and while I can’t type nearly as fast as Rose, the giddy gusto I attacked my keyboard with in order to write up this review afterwards was still pretty furious. Better, I didn’t break a single nail while doing it. C’est magnifique!