House on Eden is a Disappointing Walk Down Found Footage Horror Memory Lane
Kris Collins, aka Kallmekris, makes the leap from YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram to the big screen, directing, writing, starring, and co-producing the supernatural found footage horror film House on Eden. It’s an intriguing, handsomely mounted feature made with affection for and knowledge of the subgenre. If only it were more fun to watch and didn’t end up being so immediately forgettable.
Taking a page from the likes of The Blair Witch Project, Kill List, Midsommar, Hereditary, and [REC], Collins aims relatively high. She takes the familiar trope of a small crew of paranormal investigators (who utilize social media and streaming platforms to air their popular show) who make the mistake of researching the mysterious history of a secluded backwoods haunted house and then tries to make something mythologically complex out of it. Collins ties in, not just witchcraft, but pagan rituals straight out of Hammer horror tales like The Devil Rides Out and To the Devil a Daughter, mixing in a dash of Rosemary’s Baby for good measure as well.
But this hodgepodge of influences is too messily disjointed. Moreover, there are too many moments where the film does little to conceal any of its twistedly nasty intentions. There’s not much in the way of tension, and there are even fewer scares. Little of this is fresh, and almost none of the story comes across as authentic. This makes the finished product a little more than a competently produced cover version of a far superior original recording, and that’s too bad.
Celina Myers, another social media superstar known online as CelinaSpookyBoo, co-stars alongside Collins and comes close to stealing the picture. She’s flippant, self-effacing, and most of all funny. Myers has a handful of pithy line deliveries and a few cagey eyerolls directed towards Myers that produced their fair share of chuckles. She also does a good job of physically registering her character’s growing concerns about the precariously surreal situation she finds herself in. It’s unfortunate the film doesn’t make more of her during its climactic act.
As already mentioned, the plot isn’t exactly original. The house that’s being investigated was supposedly the site of a child abduction six decades prior, and a woman named Lilith — rumored to be a witch — was purportedly involved. Collins and Myers essentially play variations of themselves (their character names are even “Kris” and “Celina”), while the third member of their crew, cameraman Jay, is portrayed by another of their frequent collaborators, editor and filmmaker Jason-Christopher Mayer.
The trio set up cameras throughout the house to hopefully capture all of the ghostly happenings and attempt to communicate with the spirits residing there. They also set up a series of low-tech sensory devices to hopefully track the movements of any invisibly otherworldly tenants, and even attempt a half-baked séance to see if they can get a phantom to possess Celina. Through it all, the three banter and bicker as they marvel at all the strange goings on, with Jay taking the brunt of Kris’s snide remarks and vitriol.
What happens from there is supposed to be the big mystery, but there’s honestly never any doubt where things are headed. The clues to Lilith’s identity are ham-fistedly presented, and I never wondered whether or not the witch actually existed. Deaths are perfunctory and have zero shock value, and the final moments land with something of a shoulder-shrugging thud. Also, an epic third act shaky-cam and night vision chase through the house, while handsomely shot by Mayer and co-cinematographer Adam Myers, is so beholden to both the original The Blair Witch Project and to [REC], it’s a small wonder that Daniel Myrick, Eduardo Sánchez (the men behind the former), Jaume Balagueró, and Paco Plaza (the minds behind the latter) don’t collectively sue Collins for plagiarism.
There is a hardscrabble DIY aesthetic to this found footage horror enterprise that I do appreciate. I can also see how Collins and Myers have split something like 100 million-plus followers between them on their social media platforms. These ladies have undeniable screen presence, and even when their characters do something obnoxious or even downright unlikable, they still have a magnetically captivating aura that kept my attention. They show promise, and I’d be curious to see what each does next. As positives are concerned, that’s the best I can say about an otherwise disappointing House on Eden.
Film Rating: 1½ (out of 4)
